One more of my friend announces that he is now ready to be crucified. Why? Why do people do this to themselves? Do they lose complete hope in life that they resort to such desperate measures to bring back the spark in life?
Of late, everyday morning, the first thing I get to see on Facebook is congratulatory messages on someone’s wall.
“Hey Congratulations!, you look so cute together”
“Congos dude, hav a great life ahead”
Arrey! Kahan ki great life? He just announced that he is willing to abandon the same great life, and ready to jump into the bandwagon. Did you not read that? He is fuckin’ getting married.
Know what? I did think about the same? If so many people are getting married, probably there would be something good about it. Alas!
I was talking to Hari, a friend of mine who had got married a couple of months back, asking him the million dollar question – Why did you get married?
Me: “you don’t intend to have children any soon. You are both financially independent, and you have also bought your own dishes, and all the white goods, with the linen and curtains, so why did you get married?”
Hari: “dude, it is about love and commitment. It is about wanting to spend the rest of you life with that one person, and beginning today!”
I was surprised at this sudden outburst of frustration wihtin myself, and not one to give up so easily, I retorted –
“ You must be frikking joking. Who in their right mind would commit to being with someone FOREVER?”, I took a breath, gulping my whole mug of beer.
“What if five years down the line, the girl does not appeal to you anymore? I guess you would stay with her forever because you promised to. You can’t leave her because then you would be breaking the marital vows, and that be immoral right?”, I uncork one more beer bottle.
“Nah dude. You don’t get it. Once you know within that she is the one, then that is it, she is the one. The voice within you would speak in itself, and it needs to.”, Hari mutters in as much a calm way as possible, sipping his beer.
I am still not convinced, I speak again –
“Look, 90% of the couples just stay married only because of kids, finances, religion, peer and parental pressure, or something like that. If the only thing keeping a couple together is the inconvenience of divorce, then their marriage has already failed. That means romantically-speaking, the overwhelming majority of marriages fail.”, I try finishing half the mug.
“So, where exactly is the love in it?”, I ask.
“Well dude, I do not want to talk qbout this any further”, and this time even hari gulps down his whole mug of beer, getting into his thoughtful mode looking at the empty ( surprisingly!) road next to my balcony with a ciggarette in his hand.
The problem with these going to be married type is this – they do not talk. Oh! Wait, is this not the statement the wifey is supposed to be making?
The real reason why the majority gets married is – PRESSURE. Be it parental, peer or even self.
There are a lot of people who very strongly believe they are not yet ready to tie the nuptial knot, but then fear that they are soon approaching 30, and might have to remain single all their life. So they just jump. Are they happy? Well, you think.
There are an equal number of guys (am no MCP!) who try running away from marriage as far as possible, but get caught in the whole family, parental pressure and give in.
For all of you, here is a creative service –
Fictional ad! ( inspired from http://matmaniac.blogspot.com/2011/09/delayshaadicom.html )
p.s.: this is the first in the 2 post series ranting on marriage.